Marriage Story: A Review

When I first saw the trailer for Marriage Story, I knew that it was going to be heavy. Much heavier than the trailer would suggest. I knew that it was going to cause me some form of heartache because of how divorce has impacted my life. Noah Baumbach is a truly wonderful person for telling this story.

This film revolves around the Barber family, Charlie (Adam Driver) and Nicole (Scarlett Johansson), as they navigate the waters of their separation and eventual divorce, and the custody battle for their son, Henry (Azhy Robertson).

It begins with two monologues from our main characters. The subject of which are the things they love about the other. We later find out is an exercise given to them by their mediator in order to cope with their separation and to remind them of why they got married. The exercise requires them to both read their pieces out loud but Nicole refuses, stating that she did not like what she wrote. Unlike Charlie, who is all for trying to make the most of their mediation. It is obvious that Nicole will not waver and shows no interest in reconciling with Charlie and walks out. Subject to their separation, they had agreed on one thing - not to involve lawyers.

This was all set into motion when Nicole got offered a role to star in a tv show being filmed in Los Angeles, her home town. She and her family live in New York. Charlie owns his own theatre company, directs the shows it produces and Nicole stars in until her move to LA with Henry. For Charlie, theatre thrives in New York and doesn't see much of a rise in his career in the City of Lost Angels.

Whilst filming the pilot for her new show, a producer gives Nicole the number for a lawyer so that she can get her personal affairs in order. This is where the film begins to pull at the first stitch of this marriage. Nicole meets with divorce attorney, Nora Fanshaw (Laura Dern), who appears to be very charismatic and successful in her field. It is obvious that Nora is a major player in the game and Dern plays it well (but you quickly dislike Nora because of her methods). When Nora asked Nicole how their story began, it was as if the straw had finally broken the proverbial camel's back and Nicole begins the tale of their not so perfect love story.

Scarlett Johansson's performance in this scene embodied the silent and supportive wife very clearly. She pushed the message that Nicole felt as if her own success was overshadowed by her husband's and when she often communicated what she wanted, she was never heard. It was also disclosed that Charlie had an affair with the stage manager which may have been one of the tipping points that led her to initiate the separation. But it was clear that she did love Charlie. Her move to LA, her new job was something for her. It was what she wanted. She was finally putting herself first. Highlighting that she didn't have her own identity in the marriage.

Poor Charlie was in the dark through all of this. He was still under the impression that he and Nicole were not involving lawyers and that they'd handle it all themselves, hoping to fix what is broken and get back together. But alas, he got one hell of surprise when he flew to LA one weekend to see his family and was served with the divorce papers by his own sister-in-law under direction of his wife. Talk about ambush. Just after he had announced that he received a grant for his theatre company. Taking the good with the bad, I guess. Charlie is stunned and unsure where to go from here. And so begins Charlie's search for his own attorney.

At first, he meets with Jay Marotta (Ray Liotta) and from the word go you really don't like him. Marotta is all about the money and practically charges an arm and a leg for his services. To pile on, he tells Charlie of all the outrageous possible strategies that Nicole and Nora will be plotting in their camp and you can tell that with all his might, Charlie is trying to hope against hope that he still knows Nicole better and that she would never resort to such extremes as to take everything including full custody of Henry.

Marotta is too much for Charlie, so his search for a lawyer continues and it drags him through every law firm in LA and coming up empty because Nicole had been there previously and they are legally obligated to refuse him. Unfair, isn't it? But Charlie finally meets with Bert Spitz (Alan Alda) under the advice of his mother-in-law whom he has a very close relationship with. Bert Spitz's assistance is short lived because things go from bad to worse and the case ends up in court. Charlie needs to fight as hard as Nora appears to be and enrolls the help of Jay Marotta once more. Ugly tactics vs. Ugly tactics. If you think about it, no body really wins.

Charlie is splitting his life between New York and Los Angeles and you can see it taking a toll on him both emotionally and financially. Also to note, apparently he has to pay 30% of what Nora is billing Nicole. Divorce is not a cheap schtick and this movie really makes you think deeply about getting married at all. When observing the planning in both camps, the main talk is money and who should be paying whom the most. In my opinion, it is quite disgusting.

That first day in court was brutal. Nora painted a very unattractive picture of Charlie as the selfish husband, his affair, his neglect toward Nicole's needs and his reluctance to leave New York and move to LA. Jay was no better. He cast Nicole in the role of an alcoholic, an addict and someone who was irresponsible in every regard and that she owed her growth in acting to Charlie. It is safe to say that everything got so much worse once lawyers were brought into the mix. The ugliness from both parties laid bare for all to see and it left you wondering how everything went from zero to life shattering in just a short amount of time.

But the whole movie was building up to one scene. The most talked about scene. The fight scene. Nicole goes over to Charlie's apartment to talk. Neither of them knowing where to start but once it did, it was as if a dam had broken free and all the issues they had came pouring out in raw, untamed emotion and it was something to behold. The way this scene unfolded could lead one to believe that Noah Baumbach's only note to Adam Driver and Scarlett Johansson was to not hold back. And they didn't. They played so well off each other and they took eveything to a whole new level and you felt every hard hitting truth coming from Charlie and Nicole. Tissues required. It was such an intense moment to watch and if you're a child of divorce you begin to see your own mum and dad in Nicole and Charlie.

I have been a fan of Adam Driver's for a long while now and have done my best to watch everything he's ever been in and I really enjoy watching him perform (still don't have the stomach to watch Hungry Hearts or Silence and watching every season of Girls was absolute torture but I did it for him). But this was him showing us that there is more to his craft than what we've experienced in his work before this. I haven't seen Adam Driver so expressive and vulnerable on-screen since he last portrayed Adam Sackler on Girls. It wasn't just the emotional explosion in this scene as well as the physical manifestation of it all that you can feel how claustrophobic and frustrated Charlie had been since he was served those divorce papers. By the end of the fight, you can't help but feel a huge lump in your throat and being emotionally drained because it takes so much out of you. Adam Driver deserves all those nominations and awards coming his way because of this film. He was absolutely extraordinary and it leaves you wanting more from him.

In a divorce, there are three sides this situation - the husband, the wife and the child. I cannot begin to express how hard it was for me to watch Marriage Story. When I was six, my parents separated and eventually divorced by the time I was seven. When you're the child in this scenario, no one tells you anything. You are left in the dark with a million and one questions. But the main question is, "Why is this happening to my family?"

My mother and I lived in a different city that was a four hour drive from where my dad lived. And because of his job, he was always out of the country and I didn't get to see him as much as would have liked. Back then I couldn't understand why their marriage ended. I couldn't understand why I had to move far away from my dad. I couldn't understand why my life was turning upside down. Constantly asking myself, "Why didn't my parents love each other any more?" There's so much information you're not privy too when you're the kid.

When you're older, once you've had a few relationships of your own, everything about your parents' divorce becomes clearer. One or both of your parents may tell you their side of the story and you eventually find closure in realizing that ending the relationship was the right decision for everyone involved.

But having gone through this ordeal, it's really hard to find someone who would even have close to an inkling of what it is like to be a child of divorce if they haven't been through it themselves. In this regard, I find myself truly blessed to have a significant other who has shared this experience and knows the pain that it carries.

Marriage Story gave me a look into what my parents must have gone through during their divorce. The hard decisions they would have made so that they could make this new situation work for my sake. Whether they fully understood the toll it took on me, is another question. Even though I have found closure in that chapter of my life, I do, sometimes, find myself crying for that lost child that had to go through all of that heartache. It's a wound that never completely heals. But you learn to live with it.

Hopefully this film will inspire couples to be better communicators in their relationships and create a safer space for them to express how they are feeling without being pushed aside and forced to live in silence and battle their demons alone. Nothing good ever comes from being silent. A marriage is a partnership, you tackle the hard times together, whilst also maintaining your own individual identity as best you can.

Marriage Story is a hard hit of reality and I recommend everyone to head over to Netflix right now and watch it.

Thank you, Noah Baumbach, for beautifully articulating the struggles of divorce.

For being emotionally moved, I give this film a 5 out of 5.

Scores:

Rotten Tomatoes - 96%

IMDb - 8.4/10